Catfishing and romance scams: how to spot them
A catfish is someone who pretends to be a different person online, and a romance scam is when that pretence is used to get money. The signs the FTC lists are a person who wants to move off the app quickly, says they live too far away to meet, and asks for money by wire, gift card, app or crypto. Anyone who meets people online can be targeted.
Catfishing and scams aren't the same thing
Catfishing is the broad term: a fake or borrowed identity, usually with someone else's photos. A romance scam is a fraud, built on that fake or on a real person who isn't honest about what they're after. Sextortion, where someone threatens to share intimate images unless you pay or send more, is a related crime. The FTC's 2024 blog post below passes on an FBI warning about it.
Simple checks can catch some fake profiles. Others get through, and reported losses can be large, so it's worth knowing the pattern.
The FTC's warning signs
The Federal Trade Commission's guide to romance scams (August 2022) describes scammers who create "fake profiles on dating sites and apps" or contact people through social media, build trust, then invent a story and ask for money. It lists these signs:
- They want to move off the platform. The new person asks you to message or call somewhere else.
- They say they're far away and can't meet. Examples the FTC gives: living or traveling overseas, working on an oil rig, serving in the military, or working for an international organization.
- They ask for money in any form. Common reasons are medical expenses, a plane ticket to visit you, visa costs, fees to get out of trouble, or help with cryptocurrency investing.
- They push for hard-to-reverse payment. That means wire transfers (such as Western Union or MoneyGram), gift cards, money transfer apps or cryptocurrency, and they push for payment right away.
- They build trust fast, sometimes chatting several times a day.
No single sign proves anything. Real people swap numbers quickly, and some really do live abroad. A cluster is what to watch, and the money request is the one to treat as a hard stop. The FTC's rule is short: "Never send money or gifts to a sweetheart you haven't met in person."
What the numbers say
These are reports made to the FTC, so they count what people chose to report, not everything that happened. They're also not broken down here by gender, and the FTC pages below don't say whether men or women are more affected.
| Year | Reports | Reported losses | Median loss | Source and date |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 2022 | Nearly 70,000 people | $1.3 billion | $4,400 | FTC Data Spotlight, February 9, 2023 |
| 2023 | 64,003 reports | $1.14 billion | $2,000 | FTC business blog, February 13, 2024 |
Other details from the 2022 figures in the Data Spotlight:
- Of people who lost money, 40% said contact started on social media and 19% said on a website or app.
- Cryptocurrency and bank wires together made up more than 60% of reported losses.
- Gift cards were the most frequently reported payment method, used by 24% of people who lost money.
- Median losses were $700 by gift card, $650 by payment app, $10,000 by bank transfer and $10,079 by cryptocurrency.
- Reported losses by year: $493 million in 2019, $730 million in 2020, $1.3 billion in 2021 and $1.3 billion in 2022.
The median in the 2022 figures excludes MoneyGram and Western Union reports, per the FTC, and the FTC says it shouldn't be compared with the medians in earlier Data Spotlights. The FTC pages used here give no romance-specific figure for 2024. Its March 10, 2025 press release says consumers reported losing more than $12.5 billion to all kinds of fraud in 2024, which is not a romance scam number.
Checks you can do yourself
Most of these take minutes. They're common practice, with the first two taken from FTC advice.
- Reverse image search their photos. Upload a profile picture, or any photo they've sent, to Google Lens or TinEye. The FTC says a photo tied to another name, or to details that don't match, is a warning sign. It won't catch someone using a photo that isn't online anywhere else, so it proves a fake but not a real person.
- Search the person's job plus "scammer." The FTC suggests looking up what they say they do with that word, to see whether others have reported the same story.
- Ask for a video call. This isn't an FTC line, but it's widely recommended. A short live call confirms the face and voice. A refusal isn't proof, since some people dislike cameras, and a voice call is a fair middle step. A person who always has a reason a call or meeting can't happen is the pattern. First date over video call covers how to make one low-pressure.
- Check that the details stay the same. Name, job and city shouldn't change across a week of messages.
- Talk to a friend. The FTC says to talk to friends or family about a new love interest and to pay attention if they express concern.
- Meet in a public place and tell a friend where you'll be, which is advice in the FTC's 2024 blog post. More on that in first date safety.
If someone asks for money
Stop. The FTC's rule is not to send money or gifts to someone you haven't met in person. You can tell them you won't send money and stop replying.
If you've already sent money or photos
What to do:
- Money: if you paid by gift card, wire, card or crypto, contact the company or bank right away, say you paid a scammer and ask for a refund (the FTC's steps). Speed matters, since these methods are hard to reverse.
- Report it: to the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov, and to the app or site where you met the person.
- Threats over images: the FTC's blog post relays an FBI warning that scammers may threaten to make pictures public or send them to family. The FBI takes complaints at complaint.ic3.gov (not an FTC page). Common advice is to stop replying and keep screenshots, and not to pay, since paying doesn't guarantee the images stay private.
- Tell someone you trust. A friend, family member or counselor can help you work out next steps.
If you're the one with a new profile
If you have few photos, live far away or travel for work, you may get asked for a call or a meeting before someone is comfortable. Offering a short video call and keeping your details consistent is a simple way to show you're who you say you are. Meeting someone from online safely covers the first meetup, and sexting, consent and privacy covers images. Dating app red flags lists profile and chat patterns to watch for.
What to do next
- Run a reverse image search on anyone you've been chatting with for more than a week and plan to meet.
- Set one hard rule now: you don't send money, gift cards or crypto to anyone you haven't met in person.
- Ask for a short video call before the first meeting, and offer one yourself.
- Tell a friend who you're talking to and what you know, before you meet.
- Save ReportFraud.ftc.gov in your phone notes along with complaint.ic3.gov, in case you ever need them.
- If something feels off, stop replying and talk to someone you trust before you decide anything.
Online dating vs cold approach compares meeting people online and in person, and if you want to practice the in-person side, Run Game is built for it.
Sources
- FTC, What you need to know about romance scams (August 2022, page read in full; it doesn't mention meeting in public, sextortion or the FBI)
- FTC Data Spotlight, "Romance scammers' favorite lies exposed" (February 9, 2023, page read in full)
- FTC business blog, "'Love Stinks' - when a scammer is involved" (February 13, 2024, page read in full; the 2023 figures count reports, not people)
- FTC press release, new data show a big jump in reported losses to fraud, $12.5 billion in 2024 (March 10, 2025, page read in full)