What to write in an approach note (with examples)

A good approach note is one or two lines covering four things: where you were, what you opened with, what worked, and one thing to change. Write it right after the conversation, while you still remember the actual words. In Run Game it goes in the optional Notes field of the log sheet, which takes up to 1,000 characters. A useful note can be much shorter.

Why bother with a note

The two ratings and the outcome tell you how it went. They don't tell you why. A month from now, "Rejected, performance 4" explains nothing, while "Rejected. Gym, opened with a gym joke, she had headphones in" tells you something you can act on.

Notes show up in three places in the app. They appear under each log in Recent logs on Stats, on the approach card when you browse approaches in Stats, and on the session screen when you tap See approaches during a session. If you press Share after a log, your notes are copied into a forum field report draft, which you can edit before posting.

The template

Four short parts, in this order:

1. Where. The place and the situation. "Coffee line", "bookstore, fiction aisle", "bar patio, her friends nearby".
2. Opener. What you actually said, as close to word for word as you can get.
3. What worked. One thing, however small. A moment she laughed, a question that got a real answer.
4. Change. One thing you'd do differently. One, not five.

You don't need labels or full sentences. Fragments are fine, and they're faster on a phone.

This is the same order a field report uses: where, what happened, what worked, what you'd do differently. Keep your notes that way and turning a good night into a forum post later takes a minute.

Examples

These are made-up illustrations of the format, not real entries.

A success:

Farmers market. "Do you know if the peaches here are any good?" She laughed, we talked for ten minutes about cooking. Asked for her number at the stall. Change: I stayed too long on the cooking and almost ran out of energy before asking.

A rejection:

Campus library steps. "Hey, I like your jacket." She said thanks, kept walking. Worked: said it calmly, no rushing. Change: she was mid-stride, so try people who are standing or waiting.

A rejection with a clear lesson:

Bar. Opened with a long story about my day. She nodded but looked at her phone. Change: first line shorter, then ask her a question.

A bare-minimum one:

Gym lobby. "Is that class any good?" Short chat, she had to go. Fine.

Notice what these leave out: long analysis, guesses about what she thought, and judgments about yourself. "She wasn't interested" is a guess. "She said thanks and kept walking" is what happened.

What not to write

• Verdicts on yourself. "I'm terrible at this" doesn't help next week. "I rushed the second line" does.
• Mind-reading. Stick to what she said and did.
• Details you wouldn't want read back. Write about your behavior, not private details about the other person. The Name field is optional too, so leave it empty if you prefer.
• An essay. If it takes more than two minutes, it won't get written the next time.

Hesitations go in the session notes

A moment where you wanted to approach and didn't isn't an approach, so there's nothing to log for it: only Success and Rejected are logged. If you want to track those moments, write them in the notes of a session, or in your own notes app.

Session notes are separate from approach notes. Start a session from Start session at the top right of Improve, and when you end it, a "Last call" screen has a Name field and a Notes field (up to 500 characters). A line like "Saw two I wanted to talk to, froze both times, started with an easy one after" is a useful session note. Over a few weeks you can check whether hesitations cluster around a type of place or time. How sessions work covers the screen.

Reading your notes back

Once a week, open Stats, tap Recent logs to open the list, and read the notes straight through. Look for anything that appears twice: the same opener, the same place, the same change you keep promising yourself. That repeat is your next thing to work on. Sticking points helps if you see one recurring problem.

What to do next

1. After your next approach, write one note using where, opener, what worked, change.
2. Cap it at two lines. If you have more to say, put it in the session notes.
3. Write the opener word for word, even when it feels embarrassing.
4. Keep a separate line for hesitations in your session notes.
5. At the end of the week, read the notes and circle one repeated "change."

The tool for all of this is the log sheet, covered in how to log an approach in Run Game.